Beyonce Works Out HOW Much?!

Reading a story like this on Celeb Baby Laundry makes me happy to not be in perfect shape after having children!

Seriously, if this is what it takes to have a rockin’ body, then I don’t want one.

“Beyonce has moved her personal trainer Marco Borges into to her and husband Jay-Z’s house in order to shed the baby weight in record time.

A source told Star magazine, “Beyonce and Marco are up at 5 a.m. for a two-hour workout, and they do it again at 5 p.m. They do a mix of cardio, Pilates, plyometrics, yoga and, of course, dance.”

Meanwhile, she’s “living on protein shakes, egg-white omelettes, pineapple chunks and lots of ice-cold water – She’s exhausted, but totally dedicated,” explains the source. “Beyoncé’s vowed to have a better body than ever before.”

Now there’s no telling if this story is even true—not that I doubt a star would go to these extremes to look good.

But I’m really starting to wonder who these magical sources are for tabloids.

How do they know all these intimate details, but not get kicked out of a celebrity’s entourage if caught tattling?

And how much do these sources even make for spilling the beans?

So many questions!

Introducing Blue Ivy

If you hadn’t seen the first baby Blue Ivy photo yet, here it is.

According to a report on Celeb Baby Laundry, Beyonce made the decision to not sell the first baby photos and instead present her much-in-demand baby shots via a family tumblr site.

June Ambrose a friend of Beyonce said:

“B really really thought about this and she really wanted to do it this way. She just couldn’t imagine selling pictures of her baby.”

Cheers to Beyonce and Jay-Z for making a choice that was right for their family.

Not that there would have been anything wrong if they’d made a different decision.

Really? A Beautiful Baby? You're Kidding!

Perezitos reports on Kelly Rowland’s baby bragging on Blue Ivy. And her biggest point to make? Of course, guess what? The baby is beautiful!

I’m sorry, have you ever heard an aunt or anyone for that matter gush about a baby and NOT say they’re beautiful?

Rowland says, "She is just…. more precious than a diamond. She is so stunning. So Beautiful. I'm so happy for my sister and her husband. She's beautiful."

Ah! Such brilliant metaphors!

And, of course, you know, since Beyonce’s been able to prove her parenting skills for a few weeks now: "Beyonce is an incredible mother. I'm so proud of her, so proud. She's in mommy-vile and her husband [Jay-Z] is in daddy-vile, and the baby is…. beautiful!"

And oh, umm, should somebody point out that the correct spelling should be “mommy-ville” not “mommy-vile,” which has an entirely different meaning.

Just Sell the Photos Already, Beyonce!

I’m kind of in agreement with Jessica Alba on her advice to Beyonce and Jay-Z regarding selling their baby photos.

I’ve usually felt it’s just plain tacky for celebrities to sell their newborn photos even if the money goes to a charity, but Alba makes a good point as reported by The Huffington Post.

"For our family, we just wanted to control the experience. We put the money that the picture made into a bank account for Honor to do whatever she wants to do with," she explained. "It's her picture, it's her birth, and we didn't want it to be like a weird thing when we were walking out of the house with her for the first time."

If you think about it, the demand is going to be so great for this baby’s photo that it’s going to be like a madhouse the first time that baby walks out the door. Well, is carried out that door by a nanny…

So to protect the whole family from the flashbulb nightmare, better to just sell the first photos to take off the edge of what their baby looks like.

Actually, even if they sell the first photos, there’s still going to be a lot of clambering to get the first “unofficial” shots of Blue Ivy.

So, you know, you really can’t win.

Might as well take the money and put it to good use and move on.

Please Stop Talking, Beyonce and Jay-Z!

Thanks, Too Fab, for pushing me over the edge!

I think if I read one more explanation of how excited, and happy, and glowing, and joyful Beyonce and Jay-Z are with their new baby, I am going to barf.

And even though Beyonce said “Nothing can describe the feeling” about having a baby, trust me, she’s still going to try to describe that feeling anyway.

Again. And again.

And Jay-Z will write songs and market them to you because he knows you’ve just got to have his little baby girl gurgling on your iTunes.

And oh yes, lest we forget, they are so happy and so grateful and so over-the-top and so…

Oh my goodness, please make it stop.

It’s a baby. We get it. Other people have them, too.

Gag Me With a Silver Spoon, Beyonce and Jay-Z!

It’s not going to take many more reports of outrageous expenditures on baby gifts for Beyonce’s baby to make me barf.

According to the New York Daily News, Beyoncé and Jay-Z’s baby has been supplied with enough high-end baby goodies to supply a small city.

But it’s not just gifts from well-meaning friends that are pushing the baby-loot haul to roughly $1.5 million.

“The newborn’s superstar father plunked down $20,000 on a Posh Tots Carriage Fantasy Crib made of solid cedar and birch.”

Umm, OK. Twenty grand on a crib. I get that when one has a lot of money one can splurge a bit, but this kind of money on baby crap really just makes me want to hurl.

The only thing that makes me rest better is knowing that little Blue Ivy Carter will be doing just that, spitting up, all over this luxurious load of baby paraphernalia.

What do you think? Is there ever a reason to spend $20k on a freaking baby crib?!

Rock It, Beyonce and Jay-Z!

It’s a relief to read that some celebrities haven’t pimped out their unborn babies yet!

Huffington Post reports that Beyonce and Jay-Z have not even responded to the multiple offers that have been made for the first photos of their baby.

The weird thing is that when celebrities do sell their baby photos, there are clauses about them not being able to appear in public with baby before or after the photos are released.

Can you imagine not being allowed to be seen in public with your baby because it would decrease your baby’s value?

At least when Brad and Angelina sold their photos for $12 million they donated the money to a charity.

But is it right to pimp out a baby even if the money is going to do good?

I suppose if my mom and dad had been celebrities I would be kind of proud if my photo had helped people or animals somewhere.

But what if I were a different kind of person? Might I not be happy about someone making such a public choice for me?

How do you feel about Celebrity Momsters selling their baby photos?