Celebrity Mom Tweets Make Me Cry--Specifics, Please!

I know, I know, I’m being silly, but…I wish just once that a new celebrity mom would tweet a message about how tired she is or how her ankles are swollen or how something went wrong.

But don’t expect a message like that from Jessica Simpson!

According to Us magazine, Simpson tweeted a mommy gush to her 5 million Twitter followers about her daughter, Maxwell Drew Johnson.

"I am so in love with baby Maxwell. I want to cry every time I look at her. Motherhood is by far the best thing I've ever experienced."

And I suppose that means we won’t be hearing any “sources” saying Simpson isn’t doing such a good job either if this is any indication: "Everyone is marveling at what a natural Jessica is. She was born to be a mom!"

Is it just me or do these messages break every rule of good writing? Could we have some specifics, please?

Why is motherhood so grand, Simpson?

Why is Simpson such a natural mom, Mr. or Ms. Source?

What does any of this really mean?

And yes, I realize Tweets are inherently short, but still...

A Celebrity Momster's Stripper Baby Photo?

So there’s a stripper baby photo circulating around. I’m not sure who posted it or where exactly it began, but I do know it gives me the creeps.

Now, I’m usually all about supporting mothers in all of their unique parenting methods, but this photo gives me pause. Sometimes, I guess, I just need to say, eww.

At the moment, this mother, or whoever she is, remains nameless, but I wonder what would happen if it came out that she was a Celebrity Momster.

I’m curious if the Internet reaction would be different if this was a Cindy Crawford or a Tori Spelling (remember that baby turkey costume?!) or a Beyonce Knowles posting their baby dressed like this.

Would fans find a well-taken, stylized shot of a Celebrity Momster baby dressed as a stripper cute and funny? While an unknown mother snapping a quick shot in her living room is deemed inappropriate?

Jennifer Ansiton Happy Just the Way She Is

Us Magazine reports on Jennifer Aniston’s attitude to motherhood and I think it rocks.

During an interview on CBS This Morning Sunday, the Wanderlust actress complained that it's "very narrow-minded" for people to assume she's unhappy without a baby to nurture. "That doesn't measure the level of my happiness or my success in my life, in my achievements, in any of that."

To assume that if a woman has expressed interest in having a baby but doesn’t have one yet that they are somehow unhappy is presumptuous on our part.

The actress, who's currently dating Justin Theroux, 40, added that she doesn't give "a crap what other people think" and she's happier "than I've ever been."

Bravo for Aniston expressing her feelings on the issue. If only we all could say loud and proud that we are okay with who we are and what our beliefs are without worry about what others will think of us.As mothers, we need to respect not only other mothers and their ways of parenting, but possible mothers-to-be, or even those women who choose to not be mothers.

Suck It, Rachel Zoe!

This is wrong in so many ways.

The look on poor Skyler’s face says it all.

“Someone rescue me from this woman! Please, please just put me in a onesie and let me crawl free and wild! Get these loafers and turtle hat off of me!”

But, alas, poor Skyler appears to have many years of being a Barbie ahead of him.

His mom, Rachel Zoe, had this to say, according to Celebrity Baby Scoop: "It is too much fun. It is like dressing a live doll," Zoe tells InStyle at the MOCA Annual Gala in Los Angeles. "He has no opinion." 

So, babies have no opinion, thus you may dress them however you wish? Break out the beanies and the loafers! But, wait…look at that face…perhaps, just perhaps, there is an opinion brewing. Watch out Rachel!

Suck it, Rachel Zoe!

Ah! A true celebrity momster out for a stroll with her adorable son Skyler and, not one, but TWO assistants!

And I love how there seems to be the one assistant who acts as a baby buffer between Rachel Zoe and her son (great for protecting from baby vomit!).

Celebrity Momster of the day!